is it bad?

that I think about getting pregnant a lot?  Not just like, "oh, I wish B and I were/could get pregnant," but more of, "I'm about to ovulate and need to find a sperm donor."  Obviously, not seriously, but my brain still goes there.  B doesn't quite get it.  It would be so much easier with a few swimmers in there.  At the same time, I am still totally terrified of the whole prospect of anything going wrong. 

I just saw an ad for a series show on TLC about people not knowing that they were pregnant until labor.  If only.  Sigh. 

Comments

  1. MissyJuly 5, 2009 at 2:24 PM

    I think those thoughts and feelings are normal. I also caught one of those TLC shows and wished it was so easy.

    ReplyDelete
  2. MugsyJuly 5, 2009 at 5:22 PM

    I had a little break down this morning about the exact same thing...and for years I've found myself wondering about most men I encounter..."I wonder if he has sperm I could just have...." It would be nice if we could just shut that part of our brains off.

    ReplyDelete
  3. itsazooaroundhereJuly 5, 2009 at 7:52 PM

    I'm sorry you're having a rough time of it right now. Not being able to sleep is the worst...it makes the nights torture and the days not much better.

    I wanted to chime in about the varicocelectomy. We had zero sperm and the doc recommended it, so we went ahead and had the surgery. They found and repaired 26(!) varicoceles. They said we could re-test after 3-6 months but that it can take up to a year to get sperm. Since we were waiting anyway (saving money) we waited a year, and they were able to find 30 sperm in his ejaculate. It was a double-edged sword for me, because while we now had sperm, we didn't have enough for natural pregnancy or IUI, and STILL had to do the IVF/ICSI. The great thing is that it gave my husband a chance at a bio-child, which he really wanted.

    His recovery was not bad, the procedure was on a Friday and he was back at work on Monday. The swelling was pretty crazy, but that's supposedly good (more swelling = more healing). He actually has worse memories of the pain and recovery from biopsies than from this surgery.

    Ours wasn't covered by insurance, so that would be another big factor for you. The total was around $5K.

    Good luck to you as you guys sort this out. I know it's not easy. Let me know if you have any more specific question!

    ReplyDelete
  4. jrose35July 5, 2009 at 11:24 PM

    I also think those thoughts are very normal. I think about it alot especially now that we have the second bedroom me and DH are already calling it the baby's room. I watch those TLC shows a few times and wish it was that easy to get pregnant and stay pregnant. You are in my thoughts!

    ReplyDelete
  5. Somewhat OrdinaryJuly 6, 2009 at 3:32 AM

    You are perfectly normal! Even now with a child via donor sperm I still catch myself doing the same thing.

    ReplyDelete
  6. LorzaJuly 6, 2009 at 10:13 PM

    Tell me about it. I wish every single month..um, well before I had to go back on BCPs. We will never do it on our own and it sucks.

    sigh.

    ReplyDelete

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