sigh
I'm feeling a little bit better today than Sunday.
We are still at odds as to what to do. I'm trying to find a reproductive psychologist or someone to help me try to work through this. I think we'd probably both benefit from seeing someone on our own and someone together.
I don't know. I'm ready to be thrown a life raft. I don't know how much longer I can swim.
Your support is amazing. I hope I can be there for you the way you've been there for me.
We are still at odds as to what to do. I'm trying to find a reproductive psychologist or someone to help me try to work through this. I think we'd probably both benefit from seeing someone on our own and someone together.
I don't know. I'm ready to be thrown a life raft. I don't know how much longer I can swim.
Your support is amazing. I hope I can be there for you the way you've been there for me.
sweet pea- you are more than welcome. I can totally feel your pain in your typed words and my heart just goes out to you. I hope that you can find some a good psychologist to help you guys out. IF is so freakin' hard in and of it's self. Adding other tragedies like you have experienced do not help at all.
ReplyDeleteSending you bigs hugs. Do you drink at all? I am going for beers with some friends and will have one...or eight for you if you do. Send me an email of what you like to drink (if you do). I will post it for you. :) lorzarn at gmail dot com
I'm so sorry you're having to go through all of this.
ReplyDeleteIf you're having problems finding a specialist, you could check with your local RESOLVE...they often work with therapists and psychiatrists that have personal/professional experience in dealing with IF issues.
Sending love...
Seeing a therapist is a good idea, individually and as a couple. I wish there was something I could do from far away. You are in my thoughts.
ReplyDeleteWe spent some quality time alone and together with a therapist this summer as we have tried to move forward. I really recommend it. Having a trained and neutral party in the room is really helpful.
ReplyDeleteSending you warm thoughts!
Sending you love... I'm glad you're feeling better today. Allow yourself all the room you need.
ReplyDeleteI came back to see how things were going and am glad to see you've got plans in place (or are developing them). I hope these help you reach a better spot both individually and as a couple.
ReplyDeleteSometimes there are really dark days, days so dark that I never thought I would feel better again, that my life was over, that my relationship was over, that I wondered where did my husband go - where was the man that I loved - I couldn't see him in the man in front of me, they were the lowest times of my life, and one's that I try my best not to think about.
ReplyDeleteI am not saying it to make you feel worse, but, to tell you that sometimes infertility can be really hard on a couple(and some couples deal with it on a unite front etc - but some of us strugle), and that the one thing I learned was to not to judge too much, to be gentle with me, and with this relationship that I value so much, to dare I say it, just step away from all the infertility for a while, all of it, and to concentrate on all the other things that I love, and to try and re-kindle the love in our relationsihp, then when we are strong agian, we can tackle infertility again - make sense?
I'm just catching up with some blogs and I just want to give you a huge hug after your last post. I'm so so sorry you guys aren't on the same page. I agree that counseling would be beneficial and finding someone that specializes in IF is important. We still struggle with some things regarding DI and I wish there was someone near us that had experience helping couples sort out IF issues. Our counselor doesn't have that experience.
ReplyDeleteI'll be thinking of you and if you ever need anything you can e-mail me. somewhatordinary at gmail dot com
Thinking of you!
Just getting caught up with you, and my heart is just breaking to read what a hard time you are having. I think you are in So Cal, right? We have a good counselor up here, in the Bay Area, but let me know if you want me to ask her for any recommendations in that area.
ReplyDeleteWhen I look back on the last four years, I have memories of how bad it really was. Things I don't even like to think about, because there was the night I was driving home and had a crazily strong urge to drive into a tree. Bear recently confessed that he was afraid that I was so depressed that something awful would happen. I can't tell you how much help my therapist was (on my own, not even our couples therapist).
I can't even imagine what you've gone through with your family, and now the IF on top of it. I just hope you can take things one day (hour? minute?) at a time, and get through it like you have gotten through other things in the past. I do hope that in a year or more you can look back at this time and marvel about how hard it was, but that you came through it stronger. And, hopefully stronger together. I think I learned that men have a harder time than we realize with all this, and sometimes it's easier for them to just stop dealing with it, or say no. Bear certainly did that at times, and it left me in total despair. He (we) would always come around, but it did take time for us.
If there is ANYTHING I can do to help, please let me know. I've been bad about checking email lately, but will check more often at itsazooaroundhere at gmail dot com.
Sending lots of love and support your way!!